The famous smile that will be missed along Taft and Vito Cruz.

Who was Jenny? Why was he popular? Why was he loved? Why was his life celebrated and his death received an out-pouring sadness from the students and alumni of the two prestigious academic institutions (DLSU and CSB) in the Philippines? Why was he given respect that he has a Facebook Fan Page? What did he do to deserve such treatment even in death?

Was he a student or an alumnus of DLSU or CSB? No! Was he a professor? No! Was he a staff member of any of the two institutions? No! Who was he, then?

Jenny was a gay personality in the vicinity of DLSU and Vito Cruz corner Taft Avenue. Where the De La Salle and College of St. Benilde students were he was there! He was an errand boy, a help and say any job similar to those he was the answer!

He was featured in the university’s paper. And when one of the first online social networks (Friendster) started to be known he was given an account. He lived by the generosity of the students of these two famous campuses. I heard that some students were able to open for him a bank account for his savings (though I wasn’t able to confirm).

What did he do to deserve such respect and love? He was there for the students, he helped them and he cared for them!

Those were the three things he did so the students also loved him, helped him, and cared for him, when he was still alive and now that he passed away many are willing to help and attend to his wake and interment, just to give honor and respect for the person who was there for them!

One big lesson anyone can learn from the example of Jenny’s life is: to be there for the people, help them in their needs and care for them.

Thank you Jenny for your life’s example! See you in the life-after-here!

This carinderia has no name only “Bulaluhan” - which they serve more than bulalo but all sorts of ‘totoong’ lutong bahay dish. They have seafood, vegetable & the best cooked rice for a carinderia!

Nothing can entice you with an authentic offer of dish - like a Bulalo!

What made it exceptional from all the other carinderias I mentioned in parts 1 and 2 of this blog title?

1. Their service is very personal. Sometimes it goes beyond the usual business relationship. But come to think of it, when it comes to food it is always personal. Joel, the cook, is more often ready to welcome me with a very provincial smile & stories. Jasmine, the server, welcomes me with the recent neighborhood scoop!

2. They knew my gastronomic preferences already. Even before I give my order, they are ready with what I wanted for the day. If there is ginatang langka or fish, I don’t have to say my order, it will be ready in an instant.

3. For a carinderia they are particular with cleanliness. Their place is not fancy but I know that they know sanitation.

4. Their location is accessible – on the corner of 2 busy streets (Vito Cruz & Taft). It can be located easily. Even if their place is very small they are with other carinderias so they can really be a 2nd choice if all the others are busy with customers, which eventually if you will experience their service, they will be your 1st choice. They started as one of my alternatives only!

5. Lastly, they are sticking for what they are – they are expert in their name as ‘Bulaluhan’ and add on the best lutong bahay dishes, that can compete with a mother’s preparation!

Insights: To be well accepted & authentically preferred by other people be it in your neighborhood, workplace or other communities be…

• …also authentically personal in your dealing with other people.
• …be the person that is pleasing both in your body and personality.
• …be available to people.
• …stick to what God would like you to become and develop it to be the best you can be!

Masarap na Maanghang!!!

Today here are the carinderias that I like but still place as my third and second choice…

Carinderia 3: The food of this store is really lutong bahay. The friendly lady-owner told me that her mom is the one who do the marketing and prepares all the food also, in fact it really tasted cooked by a Nanay.  Yet, I noticed one time that this owner was trying to lure me to buy additional food, which I don’t like, so that I will pay more. I know she needs sales but I don’t want to be tricked – specially when it is very evident!

Insight: Be very honest in your relationship with people.  They notice when you are not genuine with what you offer. Ayaw natin ng niloloko tayo di ba?

Carinderia 4: This carinderia has well attractive presentation of their food, which are in fancy Kawalis with banana leaves decoration. The lightings bring more attraction. Their combo meals includes a soup, 2 cups of rice and the main ulam. Yet, their rice smells old no matter how I advise their servers.  So this carinderia is my 2nd choice.

Insight: Be sensitive to the feed back of people on who you are. It helps you to improve.

On the next blog I will share with you the one I find the best of all the carinderias!

Bloody procession!

This coming Friday is one of the most bloody Fridays of the year in the Philippines. This bloody day, a part of the Lenten Season is planned – infact there is people exodus going on in the major cities to have both religious and grand weekend long vacation to visit families and to see bloody bodies (not by accidents but by choice).

One of the most popular visited places during this Lenten Times is the one in Maleldo, Pampanga, where selected men of the village are nailed on the cross as penitents.

Crucifixion at Maleldo, Pampanga

Why are we practicing this?

We Filipinos are cultural Christians, thinking that to do certain religious piety or make ourselves suffer will make God love or care for us more or will make Him considerate to give our prayer requests, the like of ’suertes’ for the year and good health.

To note sadly, the least that we think of during Holy Friday, even if all the processions and pious practices are around, is the real essence of God’s sacrificial act of LOVE by giving His ONLY Son to carry in Himself the sins He did not commit but ours.  So that we may be guiltless and will not suffer the painful consequence of our sins in hell!

During that time He became the BAD one not us:

• He was the cheating employee, the selfish businessman, the corrupt government official.
• He was the flirting wife, the adulterer husband, the disobedient child.
• He was the hold upper, the murderer, the drug addict, the sexual abuser.
• He was the lustful man, the self-absorbed vain lady, the extravagant yuppy.

Name all the sins we commit and those He took, was punished and died so that we can now run free from the eternal horrible penalty.

By reading this, I hope that you will appreciate that act on the CROSS by Jesus.

To end this post let me share with you a beautiful verse in the last book of the Bible: “…Jesus Christ, who is the first witness…the ruler of the kings of the earth…Him who loves us and has freed us from our sins by His blood, and has made us to be a kingdom…to serve His God and Father.” (Revelation 1: 5, 6)

Are there people who irritate you in your workplace? The gossips and those who are only working when the boss is around, or those who feels like he/she is the boss, those who are always negative and irrate but unfortunately affecting the entire staff performance, or those who feel like they know everything and those who feel like your work place is a vacation-getaway!

You just wish they disappear from the surface of the earth but they seemed to be immortal and eternal and to make matters worst they are influencing the saints, like you! Bad of all bad, no amount of calling the attention of the HR officers no action is done!

Here’s a story Jesus told to give you some thoughts to ponder (Matthew 13: 24-30):

There is…”a farmer who planted good seed in the field. But that night…his enemy came and planted weeds among the wheat…When the crop began to grow and produce grain, the weeds also grew.

“The…workers went to him and said, ‘Sir, the field where you planted good seed is full of weeds!…’

“‘Should we pull the weeds?’ They asked.

“‘No,’ he replied, ‘you’ll uproot the wheat if you do. Let both grow together until the harvest. Then I will tell the harvesters to sort out the weeds, tie them into bundles, and burn them, and to put the wheat in the barn.”

Lessons:

1. Our workplace is one of life laboratories where we can practice the virtues we learned.  If there are no places and people like the ones mentioned above, we will not be able to exercise patience and the like attitudes.
2. Many times we only think of our concerns and our seemingly right solution to these concerns, we do not see the big picture and the bad consequences our thoughts may affect the affairs of our entire company.
3. God is more concern with the development of your character than eliminating those things, bad it may seem, that will contribute to your growth as a person.

I hope this thoughts will give you new perspective as you deal with your irritating colleagues!

You may ask, “Why after blogging about initiate new relationships, nurture existing relationships and restore broken relationships you now post about ending a relationship?”

Guys, I’m not saying sever one if you just wanted to end one! I neither talk about a marriage relationship, it has to be preserved! Save, fight and exhaust all things possible to keep your marriage!

Prayerfully consider cutting the connecting ribbon of friendship!

My point here is: Severe a relationship that makes you a sinner! Cut off a relationship that messes your life! End a relationship that makes you a worst person than before! Stop a relationship that leads you to do bad things!

You may say again, ‘Shouldn’t we love everybody for God?’

There are times that God’s love is tough too. He knows that we are weak and that when we associate with “bad” people it will pull us down because it is easier to influence a good guy to become bad, than influencing a bad guy to become good.

St. Paul said, “Do not be misled: ‘Bad company corrupts good character.’” (1 Corinthians 15: 33)

Let me mention some situations that you should prayerfully consider ending a relationship:

• Your friend is putting you to several very tempting situations.
• He/she is introducing you to try destructive vices.
• Your business partner or a colleague in the office or workplace is involving you to illegal transactions and unethical work practices.
• A friend is suggesting you to illicitly flirt with someone.
• This friend of yours is happy bad-mouthing about someone else.
• Your friend is starting to poison your mind to think evil about somebody.
• You notice that a friend is making you stop having personal devotion, stop going to church or practicing generosity and discouraging you to serve others.

Again a passage in the Good Book said, “…you must not associate with anyone who calls himself a brother but is sexually immoral or greedy, an idolater or a slanderer, a drunkard or a swindler.  With such a man do not even eat” (1 Corinthians 5: 11)

May you prayerfully consider to severe a relationship when you sense that the friendship you have is corrupting you!

Today I attended a church leaders’ mentoring group, while the speaker and our mentor-pastor spoke, two words were impressed in my mind: FOCUS and BALANCE!

On Focusing, I’ll say:

Multi-tasking is an “IN” thing today, it maybe a good practice but if we are not really efficient it might result to destructed and unfulfillment in life. We know the saying “Jack-of-all-trades but master-of-none.”

When we are FOCUS on the thing we are gifted at and that we love and passionate to do the most, it will result to life fulfillment and accomplishment in a larger scale! A light that is focused, say a laser beam, can do much better things than an unfocused light, say sunshine!

Same is true with our performances and works, if we don’t focus, we will not accomplish better and more. The impact of what we will do will not be powerful.

Balancing may not be easy but do it anyway for your benefit!

On the other hand if we are not careful, we may become extremely focused in performing so much, neglecting the other essential things in life, sooner of later we will be exhausted, burned-out and tired. The answer to this other far end of the pendulum is BALANCE! When things are balance physically, mentally, emotionally and socially life is healthy.

If you wanted to be fulfilled and healthy this year be FOCUSED and be BALANCED!

Note: For the followers of  ‘Restore Your Broken Relationship Blog Series’ I will post again about it on my next blog.

“We all know it is very easy to say ‘forgive and ask for forgiveness’ but it is an insurmountable task to do!”

Why is it so?

Because most of the times we are paralyze by the fear of the possible pain during the confrontation, so we don’t make a move to ask for an apology or offer forgiveness.

Yet in reality having a severed relationship is more painful than the confrontation. Check it out by asking those people whose families had broken relationships and didn’t move at all for reconciliation and you will hear from them extreme emotional pains.

This time, let us survey what did the Word of God, being the best life standard, says about this difficult act of forgiving and asking for forgiveness.

Mending broken relationships are like mending broken delicate Vases!

“Bear with each other and forgive whatever grievances you may have against one another.  FORGIVE AS THE LORD FORGAVE YOU.” (Colossians 3:13)

• We’ve got a lot of grievances for someone and someone else have grievances against us, but we’ve got to BEAR with each other.
• Forgive because when you don’t these grievances will become bitterness and hatred, then it will transform you to become suspicious  and miserable.
• Do not allow hurt, anger and bitterness eat you up, it is awful, terribly awful! Try it if you want!
• Forgive immediately! Ask for forgiveness immediately! Do it ASAP as the Lord forgave you! The person who offended you doesn’t need to do something to be forgiven. You don’t have to wait for a sign for you to ask for an apology.

You may ask, how should I forgive immediately, does it mean forgetting the offense? That will be the topic of the next blog!

We are the Apple of God's Eyes!

The very first Bible reading schedule I had for January 1 was Matthew Chapter 1, verses 1-17, the genealogy of Jesus.

I took note that in Jesus’ lineage there were 3 women’s names mentioned. It was a surprise because very seldom a woman’s name was included in a traditional Hebrew (the race of Jesus) family records, because this people had a very strong patriarchal society.  Women were second rate citizens.

It was also noted that the mentioned women were very unpopular and in fact considered least in their extremely conservative ancient community, these women were:

1. Rahab, a non-Hebrew, from Jericho and was a prostitute.
2. Ruth, also a non-Hebrew, a Moabite and was a widow.
3. Bathsheba, an adulteress.

BUT they were included in the record which means they were important and valued!

As I reflected on Jesus’ family record great lessons were impressed on me:

• God doesn’t look at you the way present societies and communities look at you.  You may have done something very wrong last year but God doesn’t label you according to your performance, on the other hand, He regard you based on what you can become! God values you even if… You can have a fresh new start this year!
• By that you can definitely say, no matter what you did in the past, what ever sin you may have committed He is always ready to FORGIVE you. Your parents may have disowned you, but He will not disown you. Your boss may have fired you because of bad evaluation, but He doesn’t keep a bad record. Your closest friends may have abandoned you because you hurt them, but He doesn’t leave you nor forsake you though you offend Him many many times.
• And because He doesn’t keep a bad record and never label you negatively, on the other hand He sees the best you can do and will allow you to be that.  He will use you to produce the best thing for yourself and for others!

Have a great 2010 with the way how God looks at you – You are the Apple of His Eyes! It will set this year right!